There have been many times in my life when I had to change course or pivot; it’s an essential part of life that is both difficult and necessary. I’ll share one story that is specific to an experience in college that made me realize “getting checked” was a part of life and is often out of your control. The question becomes – how will you respond?
As a kid, I was always a hard worker – no matter what the activity. From playing outside with friends, schoolwork, and sports – I enjoyed giving 100% effort. Part of this was just how I’m wired, part of it is having two older brothers and being competitive from the time I can remember, and part of it is was growing up in an environment where absolutely nothing was handed to me. As I became a teenager, I realized the benefits of working hard and enjoyed the benefits and reputation that came along with giving a great effort at all times. My senior year in high school, I had quite a few offers to play college football and settled on Vanderbilt because of its reputation as the “Harvard of the South.” After arriving on campus, I got to work – in the classroom and on the field. It was refreshing to be around so many people that were very gifted – in the classroom and on the football field. Fast forward to my final year of college – we get a new coaching staff – and the change is both a little scary and exciting. By this time, I had moved from being an option quarterback to a wide-out and the new coach was installing an offense more balanced than before (he wanted to throw a lot more than we had in the past). Needless to say, me and my fellow wide-outs were excited! We go through spring practice with the new coach and things are great and it really seems as if the offensive change will be good for the program.
The summer heading into my senior year, we start “two-a-days” (two practice each day) and everyone is excited for the upcoming season. Unfortunately, some things happened that changed the team in a negative way. A personal change for me was – for the first time, I was injured and would miss a few games to start the season. I pulled a quad muscle and what I thought would be a week off – turned into 4-6 weeks. After I was healed; however, it was obvious the new coach was going in a different direction with the team. He decided – not through merit – that he wanted to play younger players – some that were not nearly as talented as some of the upper-classmen that normally were at the top of the depth chart. The coach took a very awkward approach to making the changes – almost combative if someone inquired about the change. I set up a meeting with the head coach (literally requested time from his secretary) to talk with the coach (something that was encouraged in the past). Bottom line was – he wanted to do things his way, no matter how disruptive they were to the team. It was a rough season for the team and the coach’s attitude permeated the coaching staff as the assistants had to execute what the head coach demanded. I had a little poetic justice, by returning that season to catch a game-winning touchdown and show that I was willing to work hard, even when I felt I was done wrong. I also received the Chancellor’s award for being the athlete with the highest GPA on the football team. I was determined to finish my senior season on a high note, despite the circumstances and how amazingly frustrating the experience had become for me and many others (some players transferred and finished their eligibility elsewhere). Looking back on the situation, there were some things I could have done differently. While the outcome wouldn’t have changed, I probably would have been a more pleasant teammate to a few players (some of the younger players were drinking the Kool-Aid served by the new coach and some of us “old heads” didn’t appreciate it). That situation taught me a few things:
1) Hard work doesn’t always get you to the goal. It takes a bit more than that…you will need some help from somewhere at some point…and you may even need some luck!
2) One person not appreciating your skill set (on the field or in the work-place) doesn’t define your value.
3) Getting knocked down is a part of life that truly makes you better. If you allow yourself to self-examine and objectively analyze the situation, you can move forward with better perspective and a bit more wisdom. Failure has some benefit and can be good for you….it just tastes nasty!
I could list several things I learned from that disastrous senior year. I received an apology from a few coaches/administrators about how my situation was handled. I must say – the apologies helped ease the sting, but the lesson learned was ultimately a good one that still applies to this day. It’s truly not about what happens to you, it’s about how you deal with the situation and become a better you, no matter the field of human endeavor. So…how will you respond?

 My Advice

You will have to fight to maintain academics as the priority when you are a collegiate athlete. Playing any sport in college, while balancing studies, is not for the weak at heart. You must do what you need to do to get a degree – even if you have professional talent. Remember why you are there, not why the coaches have you there, because those are two different reasons. Ask for help when you need it – there is always more help available than you may think – for almost anything. Enjoy your college years – they will be the best time of your life. Adulting is not nearly as fun as being a kid in college – don’t rush!