My story starts at a very early age. My father was not around much, but when he was, he was very strict, angry and abusive. My mother battled daily with depression and anger issues as well. For me, growing up was just about getting by, avoiding my family and keeping to myself. As a young adult I struggled with commitment and drive, and while I did manage to finish school and start a great career in IT, I was never happy. I poured myself into my work and my hobbies in order to avoid my family. I always had an excuse for not being able to call or visit, which just added to my guilt. I continued to avoid my family at all costs, including my own mental health. As I got closer to 30 I snapped one day, quit my job, packed some clothes into my car and started driving. I moved to L.A. to create as much distance between me and my family as I could and started a new career in the music industry. I worked for a few years as a live sound technician and a roadie which was very exciting and rekindled my passion for music, but it was just another way of avoiding the real issue. Then, I broke my ankle. Self employed and without insurance, I was forced to move back to Cincinnati and go back to working in IT. But this also forced me to face the issues with my family. I eventually managed to distance myself from the toxicity and negativity and learned to take care of myself without that feeling of guilt. I found that my true family were my friends and co-workers who believed in me, and today, I have a family of my own who I am able to believe in and support and love unconditionally.
My Advice
Be true to yourself and do not be afraid to let go of toxic people in your life, no matter who they are or how connected you are to them.
Comments
Ken, I am so sorry to hear about some of your past. It’s so weird how many of us who have known each other for years through work or play, really have no idea about what each of us has gone through in our lives. I wish I could’ve helped you and others when you were dealing with your past, but that’s exactly why I’m having you share your story….so that you can help others in a similar situation as you.
It makes sense how you wanted to run from the toxic people in your life as I’ve run from my own problems many times. The problem though, is that if we don’t face these issues, it’s not like they’ll get resolved just because we put distance between them, like you moving to California. You, finally had to face your issues, not necessarily because of your own desire, but because it was almost forced on you. You were humbled because of your injury and no insurance. You didn’t have a choice. Maybe I’m just speaking for myself, but it seems to me that in my own life that I don’t want to deal with issues as well until life has humbled me too. Why does it take a good humbling for you and me and others, in order to make changes for the better? Instead of waiting days, weeks, months and many times years to deal with issues, we could deal with things right away. Thanks again Ken for your story and excited to help market your business to others. You are a great guy, are an expert in your field and other businesses would be much better if they at least gave you the opportunity to share all that you are able to do for them.
Ken, I am so sorry to hear about some of your past. It’s so weird how many of us who have known each other for years through work or play, really have no idea about what each of us has gone through in our lives. I wish I could’ve helped you and others when you were dealing with your past, but that’s exactly why I’m having you share your story….so that you can help others in a similar situation as you.
It makes sense how you wanted to run from the toxic people in your life as I’ve run from my own problems many times. The problem though, is that if we don’t face these issues, it’s not like they’ll get resolved just because we put distance between them, like you moving to California. You, finally had to face your issues, not necessarily because of your own desire, but because it was almost forced on you. You were humbled because of your injury and no insurance. You didn’t have a choice. Maybe I’m just speaking for myself, but it seems to me that in my own life that I don’t want to deal with issues as well until life has humbled me too. Why does it take a good humbling for you and me and others, in order to make changes for the better? Instead of waiting days, weeks, months and many times years to deal with issues, we could deal with things right away. Thanks again Ken for your story and excited to help market your business to others. You are a great guy, are an expert in your field and other businesses would be much better if they at least gave you the opportunity to share all that you are able to do for them.